Three Simple Words To End Child Nagging And Negotiating
When kids want something they will ask and ask until you can't full fill their demands. It is important to teach the gratitude to the children and it is equally important to stop negotiation before your kids get out of your hand." Can I have the candy for the breakfast" kids are notorious for their keep repeating words and they will ask again and again. Many times the high level of persistence is not acceptable by parents. Once kids can see that the parents are as valuable as they are, the level of nagging is down automatically.
Why do children nag? To better understand the behavior of kids, parents need to understand the root cause of the issue in order to understand or address the issue properly. According to the Adlerian psychology, which says child behavior is not random.
Nagging is a learned behavior that can be picking up by any age of children. Nagging help the children to achieved their goal of getting an extended bedtime.
How can I stop my child from nagging? Like any other behavior child nagging can also be unlearned, Lynn Lott co author of positive disciplines suggest solutions on this for the kids as young as two or three year old.
It takes three words only: "Asked and Answered". The concept is very simple. when your seven year old kids want to dig the whole in front of yard and you replied in NO and still they keep chasing you by saying " please" and then parents need to know that their kids really wants to dig hole or this is their behavior towards nagging.
Instead of avoiding their demand or jumping into the lecture, avoid child nagging by keeping eye contact and follow the below mentioned process.
Step One
"Asked and Answered"
Step two
Did you ask me a question?
Step three
Did I answer it
Step four
Do I look like a kind of mom or dad, who will change their mind if you ask me the same question again and again?
Step Five
If your kids asked again then simply ask "asked and answered". Once this technique established.
Consistency is the key, once you decide to stick on "Asked and answered "then make sure you will stick to it.
If still question arises continuously then simply walk away. Once your child see and understand that you are not engaging in the discussion then he will realize that nagging isn't an effective behavior to achieve the goal. Changing your answer will reinforce your kid for nagging but surely it is a time consuming process and required some patience but sooner or later your child will understand it.
Parents as Team: Make "Asked and Answered" a joint effort with all the stake holder of your family including your partner, family and friends in this who deals with child nagging and negotiate with your child. When your child asked five times from you, four times from your partner or three times from grandfather and still they won't get the response, they will retire their tactics. But be sure all the stakeholder of the family stay consistent.
Parenting children with autism
According to the Stacy pulley reports, when kids asked questions, take notebook or black board, write down question they have asked more than once. Like teaching whenever child ask the same question again, parents just point out that question which is being already asked and need to show them this is questioned is asked and answered already. Try to make your conversation short an crisp.
Final thoughts
At the end, to stop child from nagging the parents need to understand child behavior and personality. its part of Positive Parenting and You should be consistent in your answers and it should be short, so that they can develop the understanding to listen and respect your answers .
This Article Explains
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